January 8, 2011
Lord, right now, I feel like standing at the edge of a cliff. As I stand here, I deeply want to see what’s on the other side. I long to find out what’s out there because I am convinced that there is. But as of the moment, my feet refuse to move. I’m afraid, Lord. Afraid of seven (and many other) things.
First, I fear that I won’t find a way to cross over to the other side. I don’t see a bridge, God. Or that I don’t want to see it?
Second, if this is the case (that there is no or there seems to be no bridge), then I would have to jump. There’s no other way.
Third, if I jump, I don’t know how far I can reach. What if I jump short, God?
Fourth, here comes the high probability of falling. And honestly, I have no idea how deep this cliff is.
Fifth, let’s say You grant that I reach the other side, what shall I see there?
Sixth, will I see what I expect? What I hope for?
Seventh, will I be able to accept what I’ll find there?
These are my seven fears, God. And I still have a lot of them inside me. I’m utterly confused. The view from here is hazy. Nothing’s clear.
But one thing I am certain about, my Lord. I don’t want to stand here long. I won’t be standing here forever. Sooner or later, I have to make a choice. I got to do something. And this is my prayer, Lord. May the decision I’ll be making, may the path I’ll be taking, all be according to Your will. Direct my heart and lead my feet, God. Thy will be done.
“When GOD leads you to an edge of a cliff, trust Him fully and let go. Because only one of two things may happen. Either He will catch you when you fall. Or He will teach you to fly.”